It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
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