Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize