So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize