Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I smell stomach acid.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize