Christians are straight up FREAKS
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
