but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
May the power of my ass compel you!!
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
