i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
So many bounce houses so little time
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
