I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
