you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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