This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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