So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
