then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
