Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Dicks are not precious.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
