He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
