Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
