wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
