I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
she woke up with a sticky ear
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
