Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Randomize
