I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
