i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
