He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize