My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
