I cockslap morals
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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