yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Randomize
