some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
