her vagina looked like bernie madoff
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Randomize
