I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
