Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
