I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
