I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
