I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize