yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize