All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize