there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
