My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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