I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
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