a queef is a wish your heart makes.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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