I feel like I'm in dance class right now
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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