as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
