I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
