haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
