It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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