But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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