I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
