Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize
