i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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