As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Randomize
