I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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