Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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