My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Randomize
