Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
